The death of Dr. Donda West, the mother of rap phenom, Kanye West, should cause us all to stop and examine this nation’s fixation with being forever young, and the singular definitions of Eurocentric beauty that causes women (and men) to put their lives at risk. Dr. West’s autopsy confirmed that she died from complications stemming from recent cosmetic surgery she had undergone. According to several reports, she had sought out cosmetic surgery opinions and had been cautioned about pre-existing medical conditions that could put her life at risk. Dr. West persisted until she found a cosmetic surgeon who would perform the procedure. Dr. West, a highly intelligent woman, risked her life because she wanted to change her looks. She was willing to die to be beautiful according to society standards. And she did. This is not a predicament exclusive to Dr. West. Her (and her son’s) notoriety only highlights what thousands of women are willing to risk to be forever young or beautiful in today’s vain society. 

Though I never met her, by most all accounts, Dr. Donda West was a beautiful woman with a beautiful spirit and a beautiful value system that produced the ultimate rags to riches story in her son, Kanye. Kanye West’s music frequently intermixes his life’s lessons that were often conflicts between what he wanted to be versus what his mother wanted him to be. And while the young West took a divergent path to success, overcoming what his mother knew were significant odds to succeed in the turbulent music game, the influence of his mother’s insistence on education as a fallback option for Kanye was (is) ever-present in the rapper’s consciousness. 

The titles of all three of his successful CDs, The College Dropout, Late Registration and Graduation, were (not so) subtle references to — and many of the songs were, in some cases, were irreverent digs at — his mother’s obsession with education as the most viable option to life-long success. She installed such a strong sense of self and confidence in her son that Donda West allowed her son to pursue his dream and trusted that one day he would pursue hers (of going back to school). Her trust in her son proved to be well founded, and his success rooted in the values of his mother. 

She even gave up her career as an academician to mange his career. It’s a beautiful story. But fame and fortune has its distortions and Hollywood doesn’t always have happy endings. Dr. West’s unfortunate demise can teach the rest of society a valuable lesson — that true beauty is on the inside, and it never ages. 

Being in the public eye brings about some unfair critiques about our personal attributes — looks being one of them. American popular culture sees beauty from a singular paradigm, young and thin. Though obese and aging, the nation finds itself as an emerging market for creating beauty, and African Americans (and Latinos and Asians) find themselves now willing to die to conform to “American standards” of beauty: thin bodies, flat stomachs, small breasts, tight skin, long hair (preferably blonde) and flat butts. The interesting (and ironic) dynamic here is that European women are trying to get “exotic” (look ethnic) by adding breasts, lips and buttocks to their historical cosmetic “nip and tuck” surgeries, while black (and Latino) women are trying to look European by getting breast reductions, buying horse hair (weaves), liposuction, gastric bypasses and other extreme makeovers in order to confirm to America’s standard of beauty.  

Black women alone have created three separate billion dollar industries: hair-weaving, nail enhancement and contact lenses, trying to conform to this false beauty standard. The black “nip and tuck” industry is now the fourth ranked on which black women will spend billions in their pursuit to become ageless beauties. Men are no different. Just as crazy as seeing a 50 or 60 year old woman trying to look 30, is seeing an old ass 40 or 50 year old man trying look like a hip teenager or a twenty-something year old hip-hopper. This society has lost its appreciation for aging, and has lost sight of the beauty of aging gracefully. There is nothing more attractive than one who wears their age well…naturally. 

Yes, fifty is the new thirty, but as age is a state of mind and lifestyles become less active as we age, there are some realities to aging — namely we don’t look as we once did. Fifty doesn’t have to look like thirty, particularly when lifestyles and nutrition have caused even 30 year olds not to look their age. A fifty year old body is still a fifty year old body and doesn’t accommodate the rigors of one twenty years younger. There is no substitute for nutrition and exercise. Yet, in a quick fix society, we would rather cut (surgery) and drink (weight loss) away imperfections. Sometimes, it is necessary when weight becomes life-threatening. But surgery for the sake of vanity has become the primary reason for many of these procedures. People pay big money, and now take big risks, to change their appearances. 

It’s a deep and twisted pathology that causes us to risk life to look fit, and to avoid the eventuality of death by trying to look young. There is no greater dichotomy than a good looking body in a casket. Kinda' defeats the purpose of living to look young, not when we want that look so badly that we’re willing to risk dying just to achieve it. 

By virtue of the many life lessons passed down to him by his mother, Kanye West communicated her real beauty in his songs. I’m sure Donda West was a very beautiful person already. But society had her thinking by a different standard, and she took an unnecessary risk. Maybe there’s a lesson we can all learn in this great loss: to appreciate the beauty God gives us, and make society appreciate our beauty standards. There is a beauty that come with age, in the fullness of breasts, hips and buttocks. There is a beauty in “love handles” (both male and female ones), and the “love guts” we acquire as we age gracefully. A winkle line and a sprinkle of gray is not the end of the world if one’s self-view is not dictated by others’ standard of beauty. Even the vain need to find the beauty in themselves that doesn’t fade — the natural beauty that keeps us young, looking good and appropriate at any age. Dr. Donda West died trying to achieve a false beauty standard. Let’s hope another woman doesn’t have to die just to be considered beautiful.

 BlackCommentator.com Columnist Dr. Anthony Asadullah Samad is a national columnist, managing director of the Urban Issues Forum and author of the new book, Saving The Race: Empowerment Through Wisdom. His Website is AnthonySamad.com. Click here to contact Dr. Samad.